club sports regret — For years, Jamie Davis Smith steered clear of club sports. The expense and the demanding schedule seemed too much to take on, so her first three children stayed in recreational programs or tried activities casually. That decision is now a source of regret, she writes, after watching her youngest son thrive on a club soccer team.
Her change of heart began when her son’s skills began to outpace those of his rec league teammates. What started as recess soccer turned into a skills class, then an after-school program, then a rec team. Smith noticed that the parent coaching the rec team did not have enough experience to help her son improve, even as he trained on his own in the backyard and at school.
By fourth grade, he asked to try out for a club with an advanced travel team. Smith hesitated. The cost ran into the thousands of dollars, and the schedule would consume weeknights and weekends for the whole family. She was also unsure about having him focus so heavily on one activity at a young age. Still, she filled out the paperwork and drove him to multiple rounds of tryouts, half hoping he would not make the cut but wanting to give him the chance.
When the offer came, she was surprised to feel thrilled rather than relieved. After absorbing the sticker price and figuring out how club sports actually work, she handed over her credit card. She bought multiple uniforms and worked out a complex schedule with her husband to get their son to practices and games near and far.
Benefits That Reach Beyond the Field
More than a year into the club experience, Smith says her son’s soccer skills have improved as expected. He passes with precision and defends well, though she acknowledges he may never reach his goal of playing in the World Cup. What has struck her more is how the club setting has shaped his behavior off the field.
At least three times a week, she watches from the sidelines as he accepts direction and correction with grace. That openness to suggestions has carried over into other areas, such as organizing homework or cleaning his room. He is also learning to handle losses better. Instead of getting upset right away, he talks through what he could have done differently, and sometimes he simply accepts that his team had bad luck or that a referee’s call made a win harder.
The club experience has exposed him to adversity, too: playing in cold and rain, dealing with aches and pains, and sometimes playing alongside teammates he does not like much. Smith says this has taught him to push through unpleasant circumstances and find a way to get along with everyone. She has also seen him shift from wanting to be the star player to wanting to be part of something bigger through cooperation and teamwork. The team has given him a new group of friends outside school.
A Sacrifice She Would Make Again
Smith describes club sports as a privilege that many families cannot afford because of the cost and time commitment. She sometimes laments planning entire weekends around soccer matches and feeling rushed on weeknights. Yet she has no plans to stop and would do it again in a heartbeat. She has even been disappointed when a weekend passes without a chance to watch her son play.
Her only regrets, she says, are not starting sooner and not giving her older children the same opportunity. She is eager to see where her son’s club sports journey leads next and what other lessons he will learn along the way.
